Patience

The other day, I watched my adult daughter unload and carry four heavy bags from my car and turn to take them into her apartment building. Realizing I could not help from my double-parked car, I pointed out that the bags were heavy and suggested she make two trips.  

My daughter looked at me and said, "you have an impatient daughter," before smiling and quickly carrying the bags into her apartment building. 

I sat in my car, recalling how she must have seen me do the same thing so many times before. Seeing and recognizing my own impatience passed on was sobering. 

As my children (and I) got older, I learned how to show up as the person I want to be for myself and as an example of what is possible for my children. For instance, I learned: 

• Patience is the art of breathing through your impatience.

• Slow down. You are moving too fast.

• As a parent, you deal with bad behavior and, more importantly, whatever condition caused the bad behavior.

• Patience is born from knowing yourself. Knowing yourself helps you have patience for what you see in others.

• Failure is when you stay where you have fallen. Hold a loving space for your children to get up.

• Things take time. Planted seeds do not sprout the next day, but that doesn't mean they never will. Be patient. Things will unfold for you.

• Know that you are the perfect parent for your child. Everything in the universe is within you. With love, ask all from yourself.

When we are patient and allow ourselves to make mistakes, we treat ourselves with compassion we are better able to hold space calmly for others. In this calm space, we can accept things that we cannot change, find the courage to change the things that we can, and develop the wisdom to know the difference.